Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
