look no pants
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
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