My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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