it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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