your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
