You're so nebulous sometimes
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
