no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Randomize
