Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
