Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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