So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
