ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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