drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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