I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
