my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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