talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Randomize