Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Will exercising make me less horny?
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