You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
only you would photoshop your dick
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
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