I have demons in me.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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