So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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