Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize