he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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