Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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