He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
