My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
