is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Randomize
