its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Randomize
