she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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