i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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