i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
bring money and cleavage
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
