he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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