wrigley field is MILF paradise
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Randomize
