PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Randomize
