You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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