so explain again why im purple
no
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
