She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize
