Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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