It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
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