Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
