do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
