I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
