I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
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What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
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