Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I understand Curling. That high.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
