If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize