There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
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