At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
