a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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