Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
