So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize