She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Randomize
