I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
