yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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