who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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