K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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